Goodbye

A year ago today it was a Monday, I was very pregnant (39weeks), and we were spending the evening time after dinner outside in the dusk, letting a then 2 year old Kinsey run, bike, and draw with chalk before bedtime. Her neighbor friend was over playing and they were having a blast.Our two cats were outside with us, running around here and there, leaving and returning for a rub down behind the ears, being chased by the girls. Life was good. I don't think I will ever forget that evening, it was almost like the calm before the storm.

Sleeping on his favorite toy

Before Roy and I decided to start a family we adopted 2 rescue cats. One when we were newlyweds, living in Washington State, back in 2005. This was Roy's first cat, a seal point snowshoe. We adopted him as a kitten and named him Macchiato, meaning marked or stained (in the sense of coffee, a dark espresso drink with marks of white cream). It suited him well and he became a beloved member of our little family.

Baby Mach

"What? There's a What on my back?!?"

 We taught him all the bad habits that first time parents do, eating peanut butter off our fingers, sleeping in our bed, getting all our attention. He was a great companion, traveling with us on our move back to Albuquerque, NM, and eventually becoming a 'big brother' to Mojo, a blue point snowshoe mix, in 2006. The two were instant buddies.

Mojo in November 2006...who knew he would get SO BIG!

Checking out the snowstorm of 2006

Party!!!

Best Buddies

In 2008 we brought home Kinsey, and the cats did very well with the new addition. We have a video of us bringing her inside for the first time and both of them coming up to sniff her in the carseat.  They grew accustomed to the fact that she took priority over them, and even started to feel comfortable enough to sit next to her when she was sleeping in our arms.  At this point in time we kept 'the boys' inside all the time. We live on a busy street and there are plenty of predators nearby including coyotes, owls and rattlesnakes. But once they started itching for more attention, we gave in an let them be outside, under close supervision, in our little fenced backyard. They stayed in....for a while. Then they jumped the fence to explore the neighborhood, and eventually we just let them be indoor/outdoor cats. We knew the risks, but at this point it was just too hard to keep the inside. 

"Love the new chair, thanks mom!"

caught breaking out of jail

Back to that July evening. I vividly remember sitting on the curb in our little cul-de-sac drive, watching the girls playing and seeing Mach run under our back gate. Little did I know this would be my very last memory of him. We called it a night and came in to put Kinsey to bed, called for the cats, and when they didn't come we thought nothing of it and went to bed ourselves. In the morning, Roy called for the cats to feed them breakfast, and only one showed up. Our fat cat, Mojo. Still no big deal. But then by evening we knew something was wrong. It had been too long. We proceeded to drive around that evening and the next day...calling for Mach and looking for signs of the worst outcome. We never had any clues as to what really happened to him. He was just...gone. 

The painting my mom painted for Makayla's Nursery...
it's a bittersweet daily reminder for me of the fact that he left us just before she was born.

Being very pregnant and very hormonal this was not an easy time for me. Three days after we last saw him I gave birth to Makayla, and in the hospital I continued to search the cities lost and found website daily, hoping and praying for him to turn up.


 I had dreams of him returning for weeks and months. 


It was, and still it, so hard to not have closure. 


Good bye, sweet boy. We miss you dearly.